Sunday, August 20, 2006

The emotional cost to build this house

I am not referring to dollars but emotionally. I look at this house and see what is not done, I look at this house and see where someone else made decisions for me, I look at this house and I see what should have been, not what is. I look at this house and see a broken dream.

2004-2005 was not a good year. From crazy tenants, to shady moving companies, to Dave Exline and Janice Exline, to trying to run a coffee bar in a ultra-conservative, racist town. Who and what I am was fundamentally changed and not all for the better.

I do not believe in people as much as I used to. I do not trust that people will have anything other than their own interest in mind when I deal with them. I no longer see people as individuals but as competitors and roadblocks to my happiness. When I look in the mirror, what disturbs me the most is that I no longer dare to dream.

4 comments:

Purple Avenger said...

I just glanced at the Inspection Card scan.

I'm an electrician and the electrical issues cited jumped out at me as rather amateur.

Did an electrician do this or was the GC acting as his own electrician?

Inspectors can't catch every little thing, but when they're dinging someone for lack of straps and too many cables under a strap that usually indicates an installer who doesn't just know the electric code or simply doesn't care and is just sloppy.

There are probably other issues as well.

donna rose said...

please bro

don't stop dreaming!!! hey, everyone makes mistakes....i could/should write a book...my partner and i are going to do a strawbale house in mexico...we aim to keep it way more simple, but, we also will as much as possible go w/folk we know(and trust)...sometimes you have to step out on a lil' faith...but i like to kow as much as possible...enjoy your home...every chance you get!

donna

Lesliehm said...

Donna, thanks for the kind words and thoughts. Good luck in mexico, if you need any assistance in building let me know as I have a wealth of information at my disposal. FYI, make them build it to according to the californian building code. You will not regret it.

Anonymous said...

Have not read al your site - my partner has it on the screen - seems like your real problem is that you left it to other people to fulfil your dream - you need to build it yourself!!!